I consider my home to be above-average on the clean scale (most of the time), especially for a woman with four children ranging in age from 12 years to 8 months. But, for years, I’ve driven myself insane wondering how on earth my grandmother was able to keep her house so absolutely spotless in spite of children running in and out with muddy creek feet all summer long. In spite of the children having regular chores (yes, even in 2011, I still put my children to work around the house) and, in spite of being a stay-home-mom (I rather prefer “Domestic Engineer” if a title is required) I STILL can’t manage a dust free, clutter free, spotless home. Needless-to-say, this drives me NUTS! While I was lying in bed, no doubt obsessing over the last load of laundry I didn’t manage to get folded and put away, I had an epiphany. She must have had a mental list for so long that it just became habit. I am aware that this isn’t much of an epiphany, but at 1AM it certainly seems like one. Luckily, much like my grandmother, I too have a wonderful partner who is willing to share in these domestic duties without the weight of gender roles hindering our progress (not to mention catering to my slight OCD). Sooooo….I have managed to put together a list to aid those of you (male and female) who also wonder how your home is a mess in the morning when you wake up when you were sure it was clean when you went to bed (darn those messy house elves). Hope you all find this helpful.
Clean up the house before bed. (20 minutes - tops)
- Living room: Pick up and put away things, magazines, dishes, clothes, shoes.
- Kitchen: Clean it up, shine sink, lay out clean dishcloths, and run the dishwasher.
Think about tomorrow, today.
- Check/update calendar and/or planner for appointments.
- Start a "To Do" list for tomorrow.
- Think about: What can I do tonight that will make tomorrow morning easier? (make lunches?)
- Gather up items that you do not want to forget and place them in a spot by the door. Make sure you can see them before you walk out.
- Make sure children (and you) have their things gathered up and put away/ clothes ready for the next day.
- Lay out clothes for tomorrow
- Feed/water cats/dogs/birds etc. (if you don't have these, one less step for you!)
By the way, don't buy into that "28 days to form a habit" rubbish. Anything that we find pleasurable or associate with pleasure can become an habit after doing it only once or twice. That is how people become addicts. It feels good. There has to be emotional buy-in so that we believe the new habit is going to be better than the old one. We do what is "comfortable",even if we don't like the end result most of the time. It is familiar and safe. Consider how good it will feel to have a less cluttered home. Ahhhhhhh......
6 comments:
Excellent post.
Yep, Mom had a mental list of things that she needed to get done the next day and she prepared for that day even weeks before the day and knew the night before that all was ready to go.
I learned to lay out my clothes or at least have a clue as to what I would wear to school the next day by the time I was in the mid part of first grade. Until that point Mom had laid out my clothes the night before and showed me what i was wearing and where to find them.
Yep, the kitchen was clean the night before except maybe for mine and Dad's ice cream bowl which was rinsed out and in the sink.
You learned well.
STOP STRESSING on perfection, your grandmother never worried about it, she just did it and forgot it.
After 50 years of marriage to a bookworm I am afraid it is hopelss. I can't get to the dirt for the books everywhere
My wife says I clutter just walking from one room to another... even if I don't deliberately try. On the other hand, I'd rather be a clutterer than a "dirty" person. In my career as a mental health professional I've been in clean houses that were cluttered and absolutely filthy houses that had no clutter.
This was fun to read!
It brought to mind my immaculate grandmother; every corner of their house even smelled good. And, when she did the laundry, she used the old 'blueing' and that smelled so good! Plus, she hung her terrycloth towels on a line outside that was stretched over carnation beds so even the towels smelled good! and they'd crisp up in the fresh air and I still can't bring myself to use velour towels! Not satisfying!
She did certain things on certain days...Monday was laundry, Tuesday was ..whatever.
She did have weekly help by the time I was aware of things like this, but she was disciplined and orderly and somehow it all worked out!
I'm pretty clean but could be better...the problem for me is you clean, all looks wonderful, and then you know it's going to all happen again and that's unsatisfying to me! I just let a cleaning girl go and have to admit I get more satisfaction than I thought from cleaning my house myself... that's a nice surprise as I haven't for years!
My hobby is collecting and refurbishing old/antique travel trunks. We have 10 in the house that range from the size of a milk crate to large dome tops that server as places to collect "stuff". So, when in doubt at nesting fever time, just toss the "stuff" in the old trunk.
Gotta run, I have 13/14 (who's counting) old trunks in the barn/shed that I need to start working on. Those will go on the auction block to feed my habit. Otherwise - divorce. Meanwhile, we're working on 40 years of clutter. One day at a time. :-)
Oh, and it's a great article.
Z, I know what you mean! If you have children, it's worse. They will go out to play Saturday morning and my partner and I will clean the daylights out of the house. It will smell wonderful, look wonderful...Then, they come home! LOL Without a doubt, there is a path of destruction from the door where they're shoes must come off, through the livingroom, all the way to the bathroom where their clothes lay in 3 piles as though they melted out of them (think "Wizard of Oz", "I'm melting" scene). One of these days though, they'll be gone and I'll be incredibly board with nothing to do...I hope. :)
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